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It feels fruitless to try to control myself. I listen to a voice that says, “I’ll never do that again,” only to repeat the behavior, ad infinitum. Anyone who knows me knows I try and fail and try. Fall down seven times; get up eight.

In this new age of humanity control is an outlier. My lizard mind knows something is going on now, but what is it? What is a society without personal control? Self control? I feel like I have zero control.

I don’t care that much; I just have an opinion about everything! No action is the cream on the top of personal change; this is where we put our focus. Skim the cream and leave them alone. A decision to take no action is still a decision. Not doing anything is the cream. ‘No’ is easier than ‘Yes’ to say. Try it now.

A deep breath, a look and a ‘leave them alone,’ reminder is all you need. You cannot seek serenity by focusing on your own restoration while ignoring others. Go against your resistant mind. Leave them alone, yet embrace them.


Have I lived outside of myself, in others lives, focusing on their behaviors and experiences; and, have I let my inner self bang around in my soul, alone?’ Acknowledge when your mind floats to “what do they mean?” Know that only parents that have raised children can read intentions. Don’t become what you observe. Let it pass through you.

We are all limbs of the same body; spiritual beings. Michael Singer wrote: “No man can save his brother’s soul, or pay his brother’s debt” and “We have free will, but our free will lies in our choice of thought.” Heaven on earth must be peace of mind!

Stop trying to control others. Don’t control yourself, just stop trying to control others. Sit. Stare. Think. Don’t act. After all, is that not control of oneself?

We are always at choice. Choose to leave each other alone yet come close to those that are disturbed. Yes, embrace those that are acting out. It’s just fear showing up. Fear does not like to feel itself. Choose compassion.

Failure is an event, not an identity. Try again after each EVENT. Help others by giving them space to make mistakes and be wrong, bad, koo-koo, crazy, psycho, whatever your family calls it. There is an African proverb: “The child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.” Hurt people hurt people. 

Keep a good thought!

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Scott A. Hardy


A Fine Artist, Musician, Writer, and Personality, Scott can be seen mixing paint, beats and prose in the basement or sliding on his Ferragamo’s into the board room throughout Southern California's Wine Country. Currently, Scott is completing his second novel and feeding it into his blogs, developing his podcast, writing songs, creating art for installation at commercial and residential locations nationwide and building a new home with his wife and manager Jill. He is focusing on "being here now." Live in the moment.

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